i'm so depressed right now. i just don't have the energy to do anything, not even sleep.
i want you to call me now! call me and tell me you love me. call me to reassure that everything will be okay.
even though i know it won't be okay.
i just want to break down and cry, break and let it out. Just break.
I can't stand trying to figure out what's wrong with myself. I just wished someone would understand how i felt.. Someone i could talk to. Someone who i can turn to for advice. But what do i have? Nothing... absolutely nothing. There's not one person in my life who could understand my state of being at the moment. No one.
I wish you were here
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you know sometimes it's okay to feel trapped and even depressed because things in life that are supposed to make you happy don't, you just learned to be so fulfilled with them that you starting losing the value of them. they are no longer special, it doesn't give you the same tingly feeling it did before, you don't laugh the say way you did and your smile just doesn't seem to come as natural as it did before. By the sounds of it, you made your relationship with him a routine. Maybe you wanted the relationship like that, but in time every spark you guys ever share all disappear and you're left with nothing but desire. The desire to do almost everything that hurts him simply by knowing that it involves you letting go of him and finding someone who has even more value than he does now.
ReplyDeleteyou're not alone and most definite not the only one who has gotten through this stage. Don't fret and feel discouraged or raged because you feel this way. I hope you find your way around things soon (: Good luck !